Trump Striving To Be Psychic-in-Chief — Declares He ‘Can Feel’ Terror Threats

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There are a lot of attributes one could want in a Commander-in-Chief. For instance, President Obama is a Constitutional scholar and brilliant diplomat who also fights for equality. Or maybe you want a war hawk, one who will show no mercy — fire first, aim later –much like President George Bush (your pick, they both were).

Then, there are those who look for such a unique attribute that it makes a candidate seem almost irresistible — psychic ability.

What? you ask. That’s ridiculous. No, it’s not. not at all. Well, not if you believe Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump. He’s just revealed that he has major psychic abilities.

At a campaign event in Knoxville, Tennessee, Trump addressed his crowd of supporters about the attacks that just occurred on Friday the 13th in Paris, France. He let them know that he has a certain “instinct” for being able to sense when impending doom is about to happen.

He said:

“In my book I predicted terrorism. Because I can feel it… I can feel it like I feel a good location.”

Can you imagine? Having a Commander-in-Chief capable of using his psychic superpowers to predict impending doom?! No more mass shootings. No more extremists. No more Fox News, because it won’t be necessary to fear-monger anymore.

You know what? I bet Trump has a red cape on under that perfectly tailored suit as well.

Trump told his crowd:

“I really believe I have an instinct for this kind of thing… Nobody knew this kind of terrorism before. But I felt it. And you have to have somebody that has an instinct to lead this country.”

Seems legit. His superpowers will prevent all evil from happening everywhere. I bet his father’s name is Jor-El. Or maybe he’s the new Miss. Cleo and will come out with his own 1-900 number. Congress can call it before every bill is put up for a vote to know what the outcome will be after its been implemented.

Nevertheless, Trump pretty much thinks he’s perfect in every way. Pardon me, “great” in every way. So it’s not really surprising that we can add “psychic” to his list of things he thinks he’s good at.

Featured image: Gage Skidmore (flickr)/Wikimedia Commons/photoshop