Feds To Cut Off Militants’ Power And Phone Lines: ‘It’s Flat-Ass Cold Up There’


At this moment, it’s 17 degrees in Burns, Oregon, and the armed militants who have taken over a federal building and the immediate area around it, which prompted many school closures, are about to freeze their whiny ‘patriot’ asses off when authorities cut off their power.

The crybaby militants will be exposed to sub-zero temperatures in an effort to flush them out. An unidentified federal government official told the Guardian that authorities were planning to cut off the power at the refuge. “It’s in the middle of nowhere,” said the Washington, DC-based official, who added,“And it’s flat-ass cold up there.”

He’s not lying.  This Sunday night, the temperature in Burns is forecasted to be 7 degrees.

A federal government official told the Guardian that authorities were planning on Monday to cut the power at the refuge. So far, there has been a lazy response to this occupation by armed anti-government militants. The local sheriff, FBI, and other law enforcement officials have failed to confront the militia, who are heavily armed and have lookouts on a watchtower.

The Guardian reports:

‘The militia have said they do not want a violent confrontation but made clear they are armed and prepared for the arrival of law enforcement officials. However, it appears that federal authorities were planning to use the power cut, and an attempt to starve the militia of supplies, in order to force them out.’

“After they shut off the power, they’ll kill the phone service,” the government official added. “Then they’ll block all the roads so that all those guys have a long, lonely winter to think about what they’ve done.”

The militia, which is reportedly numbered at a few more than a dozen people, have been building fires to stay warm and sleeping in the building they’ve occupied, which is usually used by the US Fish and Wildlife Service that runs the refuge for wild birds.

The armed group, led by Cliven Bundy’s sons, say they aren’t concerned. Ammon Bundy said in a phone call that electricity in the refuge building was still functioning. Bundy added, “We’re ready and waiting if the power should be shut down.”

And about that. The self-deemed patriots are so ill-prepared that they had to put out an alert, begging for people to send snacks. Since then, the group has been widely mocked on social media. The militants brought a minimal amount of supplies, which included a few cartons of dry goods like canned beans and macaroni and cheese, a few more sealed boxes, some Ramen and sacks of oatmeal and flour.

What kind of a person forgets to bring snacks?

Beware of traps, Patriots!

How will these ‘patriots’ use their Hello Kitty computers if they can’t recharge the batteries?

The militants have also whined that Black Lives Matter protesters are treated better than them, which is almost a funny remark, except for it being so profoundly stupid.

What’s really disappointing is that these armed insurrectionists actually believe they are fighting for our freedom while the family at the center of the dispute does not want them there. Neither do the townspeople. And for sure, the birds at the sanctuary do not want them there.