Donald Trump does not have a discernible sense of humor. In fact, there are quite a few things he does not have like compassion, a sense of boundaries, respect for the law, and the list goes on. Yet when it comes to humor, there are the occasional comments that are rib-splitting funny to the rest of us.
Tuesday, the president met with a group at the Economic Club of New York. When he spoke to the crowd, he said that he was “very much into climate,” according to CNBC. We can just see Saturday Night Live’s (SNL) Trump imitator Alec Baldwin saying:
‘I’m very much into climate. I like it on my ice cream and on my scrambled eggs.’
Then, the real Trump said:
‘I consider myself in many ways to be an environmentalist.’
Once again, enter Alec Baldwin:
‘Yes,There’s the North way, and the South way, and the Chinese way.’
POTUS continued referring back to his work as a builder of skyscrapers and tenant low-income housing:
‘I did the best environmental impact statements.’
The SNL character might have said:
‘That’s right. We have environ-mental group sessions, environ-mental shots to cure it, and environ-mental health days at the White House.’
Then, the actual commander-in-chief said that environmentalists were “loco.” Enter stage left Baldwin’s character:
‘Environmentalists are loco. That means they like to ride trains. I know because I have a big brain. I was an original member of the flat earth club.’
Last week, the real 45 formally ended the Paris Climate Accord, one of his many environmental rollbacks. The fake Trump would have said:
‘Well, sure I ended the Paris Climate Accord. Obama loved the people of Paris, but I say let them take care of their own city. Just the way I took care of New York.’
Then, the real not-funny Trump said:
‘I don’t think they (Democrats) even believe in energy. So far I haven’t found any form of energy that’s acceptable to them.’
Baldwin could have said:
‘Democrats totally have low energy. I offered them one of my Cokes, but they just said that high coke emissions were bad for you. Coke isn’t bad. I drink 12 a day and look at me.’
Then, the real Donald Trump said:
‘I think I know more about the environment than most people. I want clean air. I want clean water. I want a wealthy country. I want a spectacular country with jobs, with pensions, with so many things. And that’s what we’re getting.’
Enter Baldwin’s Trump:
‘That’s right. I know more about the environment than most people. The dentists, the preachers, and the sea captains. They don’t know anything about environment. And I like water, just not to drink.’
Then, the actual president attacked the Democrats:
‘They tried to shut down energy.’
Baldwin’s character realized that this line was too funny to beat, so he repeated:
”That’s right. Look at low-energy Biden. He can’t even get out of bed. But my UN Ambassador, she’s married to a Coal magnate. I did that. All By Myself.’
The actual man in the Oval Office finished saying:
‘For years politicians told Americans that a strong economy and vibrant energy sector were incompatible with a healthy environment, that one thing doesn’t go with the other.’
Baldwin would have said:
‘True. So true.’
The Mueller Report Adventures: In Bite-Sizes on this Facebook page. These quick, two-minute reads interpret the report in normal English for busy people. Mueller Bite-Sizes uncovers what is essentially a compelling spy mystery. Interestingly enough, Mueller Bite-Sizes can be read in any order.
