Giuliani Suffers Impeachment Induced Sunday Conniption Fit On Live TV


Going so far off the rails that one makes Fox host Jeanine Pirro sound reasonable is an impressive feat, and this weekend, President Donald Trump’s personal lawyer Rudy Giuliani accomplished the task, and then some. During an on-air conversation with Pirro, Giuliani launched into an angry tirade of conspiracy theories. That tirade has grown from the comparatively straightforward (but baseless) allegation that Joe Biden, while vice president, pressured Ukraine to fire a corrupt prosecutor to protect his son to Rudy’s current litany of claims, which includes that some dark shady forces tried to murder the corrupt prosecutor.

And to top off the laughably frenzied conspiracy-fest, Giuliani threw in a shout-out to his podcast. Seriously!

Discussing those who’ve brought the impeachment case against the president, Giuliani railed to Pirro:

‘Half the time, he’s lying his head off! The fact is, he’s covering up a massive scandal at the highest levels of the United States government and the Ukrainian government. The vice president of the United States corrupted the president of the Ukraine. They’ve got all the media on his side! I’ll say it one more time — Joe Biden has been a big crook for most of his career. Every time Joe Biden was a point man, you know what happened? The Biden family made millions.’

As if that wasn’t ready enough to get plastered across conspiracy theory blogs across the web that have names like Patriot Truth Bot Ultimate 5000, Giuliani kept going.

Pirro asked Giuliani if he had any actual evidence for his claims, which apparently now include that the Bidens roped the Ukrainian president into their bribery, extortion, and murder scheme. The lawyer spouted off in response:

‘I’ve got the evidence. I’ve been showing them the evidence for months… I put out the evidence in April, I put it out in March, it was ignored! You saw it on television, on Fox. You saw Shokin testify. It was just on OANN! It gets censored! You don’t want to look at the evidence! It’s out there. There are people on television.’

…No, there’s not censorship. The problem is simply that the far-right outlet known as the One America News Network (which sounds nationalistically racist just from the title) is one of the only outlets willing to air Giuliani’s half-baked “evidence” that largely consists of personal testimonies from debunked, corrupt officials with reputations to try and salvage.

But alas, he continued. He’s still trying to convince us that a secret conspiracy included the attempted murder of someone who dared to oppose the Bidens. Discussing that prosecutor who Joe Biden targeted, Giuliani exclaimed:

‘I have the records from the Austrian hospital that show they attempted to murder him. This is very dangerous, and these people are despicable! What they are doing is despicable!’

Perhaps it was the space pirates who attempted to murder the prosecutor, Viktor Shokin! After all, they’re a credible threat; that’s why Trump started a Space Force, right? Wrong. He and his cabal of loons are only going further and further off the rails.