Trump Suffers Massive Wednesday Morning Mental Collapse From Europe

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All it took for Donald Trump to control the government was the Majority Leader of the Senate Mitch McConnell (R-KY), a Roy Cohenesque Attorney General William Barr, and the Speaker of the House. He owned all of these men until the American public rebelled and installed a Democratic House of Representatives. Now, Trump has moved on to his other box of tools: just say no to the House, scream “Fake News,” and full steam ahead. This is what our out-of-control president had to say today.

After leaving France, Trump wanted a bigger better military parade than it showed him. After leaving London, the president showed us he wants a royal patriarchy:

Then, the president’s alter-tweeter slipped in a message about D-Day:

‘As we approach the 75th Anniversary of D-Day, we proudly commemorate those heroic and honorable patriots who gave their all for the cause of freedom during some of history’s darkest hours.’

His staff was so terrified of him they hid a warship, the U.S.S. John S. McCain. They hid tens of thousands of London protesters from him, too:

‘I kept hearing that there would be “massive” rallies against me in the UK, but it was quite the opposite. The big crowds, which the Corrupt Media hates to show, were those that gathered in support of the USA and me. They were big & enthusiastic as opposed to the organized flops!’

POTUS wanted to attack the media and jail his former opponent Hillary Clinton and others on his enemies list using his Department of Justice, but it has not worked in the past:

‘Plagiarism charge against Sleepy Joe Biden on his ridiculous Climate Change Plan is a big problem, but the Corrupt Media will save him. His other problem is that he is drawing flies, not people, to his Rallies. Nobody is showing up, I mean nobody. You can’t win without people!’

Clearly, Israel has been the president’s friend:

‘.@FLOTUS Melania and I send our deepest condolences to President Reuven Rivlin and the entire State of Israel upon the passing of Mrs. Nechama Rivlin. Mrs. Rivlin represented her beloved country with grace and stature. We will miss her along with all those who knew her.’

The royal Trump family went abroad to meet England’s royals:

‘Could not have been treated more warmly in the United Kingdom by the Royal Family or the people. Our relationship has never been better, and I see a very big Trade Deal down the road. “This trip has been an incredible success for the President.”’

Then, he went after the House Democrats and took a victory stroll over his wall:

‘House Democrats, fresh off a Republican victory against them (in Federal Court) on the Wall, keep asking people to come and testify regarding the No Collusion Witch Hunt. They are very unhappy with the Mueller Report, especially with his corrective letter, & now want a Do Over!’

The president then bent the poll numbers and beat the media up some more:

‘If the totally Corrupt Media was less corrupt, I would be up by 15 points in the polls based on our tremendous success with the economy, maybe Best Ever! If the Corrupt Media was actually fair, I would be up by 25 points. Nevertheless, despite the Fake News, we’re doing great!’

Next, Trump blasted ahead with his attack on one of our strongest economic partners, Mexico:

‘“House Republicans support the President on Tariffs with Mexico all the way, & that makes any measure the President takes on the Border totally Veto proof. Why wouldn’t you as Republicans support him when that will allow our President to make a better deal.” Thank you @GOPLeader’

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